never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Dress was in bathroom covered in shards of glass, earrings on living room floor, bracelet still missing, purse in backyard. The cast of Princess Bride all left the bar to make sure I was ok. Perfect night
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
Randomize
