I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My dick has been asking about u. He said he didn't do anything wrong n I'm a dumbass
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
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