Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
no one is here. wer drinking in the beer garden in the dark and we stole a bucket of blue paint off the sidewalk. now her legs are blue.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize
