Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Is 10 pm too early to booty call a freshman?
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Ok seriously I'm living off of bologna but I have 4 handles in the freezer.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
I literally blew him under my face mask. Not because I thought it'd protect me from COVID, but because I wanted to prove to myself that I could.
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