I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
you ever get that eerie feeling when you walk in a room, when you know youve barfed here before.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
We are going to get high as balls and watch netflix
THIS IS WHAT BEING AN ADULT LOOKS LIKE
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Randomize