he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
Just set myself on fire a little bit. Made me think of you.
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Randomize
