hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
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