If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
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