so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
zippers are such a cool invention
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
i just remember sliding through the snow and yelling i love america before puking on the oncoming cars
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
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