I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
Just got that "I know what's going on with your vagina" look from that CVS cashier.
You bought MORE?!
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Randomize
