dude your cousin who was wearing the skirt wasn't wearing any underwear
gross she's a slut
yea she doesn't shave either
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
So... I may have accidentally just sat on a strip of a home waxing kit.. naked... Assistance is definitely needed....
My mom just asked me about the teeth marks on my headboard..
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize