we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Remember when spice girls "Two Become One" came on just as we were about to fuck? talk about a boner jam
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
