nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You never cared about felonies while buying me alcohol from the little Asian woman across the street
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
