I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
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