he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
Since Josh is going to be Carl Sagan for Halloween, he bought a turtleneck and sportsman jacket. It's all my nerd fantasies come true.
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
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