So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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