You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
You lost me at unexpected butt stuff. Everything else I would probably do.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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