apparently when i got back to tyler's i layed face down on the bed and yelled "don't hurt my asshole!"
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
Steve, that episode of cops where your dealer rear-ended that family is on again.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Randomize
