Dear Mark, please dispose of your crusty mcdonalds napkins used to jerk it at my desk
discrete masterbation is a lost art
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Don't go to sleep yet I need your Mexican roots. Can you come make guacamole
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
Randomize
