It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Randomize
