If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
just found a picture from last night.
the one of you riding a horse with nothing but a bulletproof vest on?
uhm.... no?...
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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