I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize