i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Hooker in the library. I repeat, we have a hooker in the library. This is not a drill.
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
