i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
I thought my sex drive was gone but let me tell you it is back with a vengeance
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
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