That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
she requested me as her brother on facebook.... biggest. letdown. ever.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
Randomize
