So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
You don't make any sense
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