We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
My housemates are judging me because I'm high at 8am and making Spongebob shaped Mac and Cheese
They know nothing, John Stoned.
No matter how many miles separate us, I will always be here to get you through whiskey shots.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
