he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
this dude just took some girl under your house for half an hour. you may have helped a 17 year old fuck on the beach for the first time. congrats.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Randomize
