So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
so "excuse the stench" wasn't the correct thing to say when your boyfriend's parents walk in on you shitting. Live and learn
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize