yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Why are handjobs necessary in class?
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Are you in a cab?
I'm close- can you order me a bowl of vodka?
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
Send help, water and tortillas.
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I feel like sleeping with foreign people is a long term investment. It's like a time share. Now when I go to London I have a place to stay.
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
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