I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
I just sat through a State Farm mortgage Insurance commercial to watch a Trick Daddy video. Is this the target audience they are going for here?
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
Randomize
