5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
Because 9 pm Thursday you drink a loco cause you just wanna get drunk and have a good time with your friends. Then you wake up on Tuesday and you've had 17 locos and you're pregnant, lying on the side of the road, 3 states over. THAT'S why we don't have only locos parties.
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
My day went from bad to worse when I realized I puked out my second floor window last night.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
You know it's a pretty bad night when an injured penis is not the worst thing that happened to you. Fuck tequila
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Nothing will ever be as awkward as looking my mother in the eye and talking to her while I have a dick inside me. Time for a lock on my door.
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