jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
My vagina is officially offended.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
what do you mean he's functionally heterosexual
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
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