You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
You got ahold of his prescription papers and gave out prescriptions for cranberry and vodka
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Somewhere between yelling how am I gonna make it to my flight and more titie shots I stopped caring
Vodka shot parachutes
Fucking utilizing a thrid story dorm room
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
...okay, you can't just say 'masturbating llama' and not explain yourself
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
Randomize
