If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
Haha he acted like he's never seen a tampon catapolt across the hall before
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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