im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
so i woke up with ketchup and a sticky boob on my face...this is a new low
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
That awkward moment when you bring a guy back to your place then have to tell him you only have magnums.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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