Do you still have your period?
i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
I woke up, mistook him for my ex, and started screaming. It was all that chest hair. I don't think this relationship is going anywhere.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
