so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I really have a thing for Greek chicks; I feel like while we are having sex she has the ability to make hummus which is just too appealing for me to pass up.
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
We were drunk at 3am with no food. I sent him to the lobby with ninety cents for like a bag of chips and I swear on my life he came back with a meatball sub
...did you ask him where he got a meatball sub at 3:00am?
He just kept mumbling something about being a hunter/gatherer
Oh AND he got us two bags of chips.
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