Dual....:-)
Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Just fell off a train. Bad.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
You know how I know she's ugly? 97% of her profile pics are flowers or animals. And what do we know about pretty people and the Internet?
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
We're too hungover to prance.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
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