My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I look excited, but its just a facade.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
Randomize
