You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
He called me while he was having sex and asked if I wanted to go get mcdonalds
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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