Im glad youre not pregnant with that New Jersey assholes baby. Your vagina would have smelled worse than Newark.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
In unrelated news guys should not ask what I'm doing/wearing if they can't handle an honest answer. I'm not pretending I'm not sitting on the couch in yoga pants watching Community so you can beat off.
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
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