Rock
Scissors
Fuck
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
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