she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
My life is a joke. Told everyone last night that they could call me Mrs. McCormick because I'm gonna end up alone with a handle of peach vodka anyways.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
She's high and screaming MEREDITH IS A WHORE
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
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