oh god was she eating orange peels again
Jenny was looking for something soft to drink since it's only noon, she chose spiced rum. Think she might die today
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
Summers almost over and we haven't golfed, got naked or had sex yet. Let's do all three in one day, no particular order.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
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