I wannas sexs uuuuu
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
For someone who wanted a break I'm getting way to much dick
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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