Pregnant stripper...not hot.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
You left your Xanax bottle in my car. Why is the label all smudged?
I spilled wine on it.
I just slammed a bottle of white wine before I came to Whole Foods so basically I'm just training to be a middle aged white woman.
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