She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
The best revenge is premature balding
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
by the end of the night two people were passed out at the table, three on the couches, and one in the bathroom. it looked like someone pumped sleeping gas into the middle of a dinner party.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
i am craving dick and cupcakes
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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