Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
