i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
He just randomly started talking about Haiti and Conan O'Brien and his grandpa's hip replacement operation. It was the worst phone sex I've ever had.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I JUST SAW A SIGN LANGUAGE CATFIGHT
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
He gave me an orgasim so fantastic that I had an asthma attack.
I PUT IT IN THE UNIVERSE THAT I WANTED TO STAB HIM AND THEN SOMEONE DID! KARMA IS A BITCH AND SHE IS BEAUTIFUL!
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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